Department of Medieval Vampires

I'm convinced that the dmv is run by masochistic, comedic geniuses. Inside, they're laughing as we wait in the line, contemplating our escapes, thinking that living a life with expired plates, always looking over our shoulders for the fuzz, can't be as bad as the agonizing peril of the dmv line. With all that said, you can imagine my excitement when I learned (last time when I was waiting in line to re-license the scoot) I could register my vehicle online. I couldn't believe that they would give such a gift to us, that they would untie us from the whipping post of the line and set us free to frolic in the information superhighway...sounds too good to be true, huh? it is. at least to me. here's my story:
I went to register my truck (which, by the way does not have a name (she's female). it's a red s10 pickup, she's had some good years, low miles, and needs a new muffler (kind of brash and outspoken) give me some ideas, peeps.) and everything was going so smoothly. enter name...check. enter license #...double check. blah blah blah...check, check, and check. I chose my payment method and hit enter and then waited for the transaction to go through so I could go about my day. I waited (because, you know, it may take a couple of minutes to complete, and hitting the back button could interfere with your transactch.) and waited (5 minutes), and waited (25 minutes). By this time, I knew what had really happened. they got me, it was a classic kansas city shuffle. I had no choice but to call the dmv, and they put me on hold (5 minutes) and transferred me to someone who could help me (another 5 minutes) who actually "accidentally" hung up on me. Repeated that process (8 minutes) and finally talked to the scorpion woman who hung up on me and she so graciously told me "I don't know what to tell you, did you try hitting the back button?" Seriously?!? I don't know why I thought I would be able to slay the dragon that is our dmv. I didn't even make it to the lair. eventually, I ended up succeeding, but only because they were convinced I'd waited long enough.
ok, food:
I loved that curry recipe from last week so much that I made a veggie version on friday. It was super fast and even tastier. I omitted the coconut milk step and added some plain yogurt in its place. The burgers were made out of turkey and bacon extract (for moistiness), and spiced with cumin and coriander. topped with some bacon, purple zebra tomatoes, and cheddar. used buns from LeQ, excellent. Last dish is a salad made with tuna and potatoes, cherry tomatoes, and candied walnuts. Would love to post recipes, but the dmv dragon ate up most of my time. pieces.
DISH recommends: riding a bike and taking the bus. almost worth it to avoid dmv workers. I hear most of them are retired dentists...not surprised.


Mare-Bear said...


Anonymous said...

Wow... I think you are onto something. Sucking the life force from auto owners since 1917. Awesome post. - Moose (Amy can explain who I am.)

Anonymous said...

Ah.... Demonic Merriment Vanquishers. Don't worry - there is a special circle of hell reserved just for them. I think it has something to do with waiting in line eternally while simultaneously being stung by huge swarms of bees and listening to small children shriek nonstop in their vicinity. -mc